"I thought you'd fallen down the hole," she said jauntily, brushing past me and jack-knifing to prepare to sit and piss."Close the door, dear," she s...id. In an instant, I decided to close it from the inside and gave her an awkward smile."As you wish," she said, "but I really need to wee. Lock it."The laughter in the front room had turned to an animated discussion as I twisted the little lock. When I turned back to Mrs Hubert she was sitting on the toilet with her knickers stretched at her. Unfortunately, the day we found out Eve was pregnant was the day the feces impacted the rotating blades.It started out normally. Eve tested herself like she had been doing every day, in fact sometimes two or three times per day. For someone who had balefully contemplated a loveless life as wife and mother of someone's heir, she seemed pretty excited about the prospects of being pregnant. The fertility drugs they had in those days were just as effective as the ones we have today; if a woman had. More

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