I was excited about the prospect of someone doing what I told them and truth be told I was kind of looking forward to corrupting her a little. I wante... to see how far I could push her. Partly because I just liked the idea of being in control like that but mostly because I wanted a friend I could share this with. I know the whole situation with Ben would forever be a secret but I wanted so badly now to be naked around people. The nearest nudist beach to us was hundreds of kilometers away,. I sit among the half-unpacked boxes, suddenly drained. I'm tired, oh-so-tired, both physically and emotionally. It hitsme when I least expect it, and the only thing that seems to help is sleep. So I stumble back to my bed and lay there, waiting for sleep to overtakeand heal me. But the one time I crave it, need it desperately, sleepfails to come for me. I lay there, exhausted, too tenseto sleep. Relax, I try to tell myself, just relax and sleep willfollow. Twenty minutes later and not. More

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