Tatiana informed me that one of the doctors who ran past was the best surgeon in Russia and is Vladimir Putin's private surgeon."Jack held me and whis...ered, "Masha, I will never be able to forgive myself if he dies..."I crossed myself, pulled out my prayer rope1 and began to pray.1 Orthodox prayer rope – used by the Orthodox to help them concentrate while saying the Jesus prayer (Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me). When you pray for someone else you substitute their name for "me".. In Pete’s mind, my feelings were still far too raw. Pete wrote the final part of our story quickly and in a hurry to draw a line under it. But for me, guided by our counsellor, while I have cried, screamed, stared into space, deleted it umpteen times, deleted chunks and rewritten them and even now there is loads that I must be missing, I’ve found writing this down cathartic and a help in the healing process. It was very typical of Pete to do what he did, trying to protect me, but in the end. More

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