And the kids? People have this strange idea that, especially at Christmas time, kids are charming little angels. They are not! Most of them are little...devils that pull on my beard to see if it's real then put their gum in it when they find out it's not. Spiteful brats!All day, every day... "Santa, I want a Playstation 3. Make sure it's a 3 'cause I already got a 2 and I don't want another one of those. Are you really that fat? Is that you that smells?"Or, "Mr. Santa Claus? You have to give me. .. maybe I'm mostly lesbian." How can you be 'mostly lesbian'?" I scoffed."Oh, come ON," Adrienne pouted. "Don't make this harder than it already is!"I squeezed her hands and took a deep breath, burying my attitude and gesturing for her to continue."You read the Kinsey thing, right? How he's got that scale from zero to six where zero is totally straight and six is totally gay? Well ... maybe I'm ... like a five."I arched an eyebrow."Think about it! I've ALWAYS been horny for every hot girl I. More

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