Turmoil my ass, I was in Hell. I was ripping myself apart inside by thinking about things such as commitment, marriage, sex, k**s and how nice it woul... be to build that life then upon analysis all the bad associated with that would cause me to instantly shift back to hunkering down, keeping guard and staying at arms length forever.I knew what I needed, I needed to pull back from everything and everyone to have room so I could think without distraction and undue influences. I had plenty of. I was hoping I could take you all the way, but I guess I can’t.”“It takes practice.”So when she started again, I held her head steady and tried to push down her throat. I made it very briefly before she gagged and pulled it out.”Coughing and clearing her throat, she said, “Wow! I’ll have to practice more.”That gave me visions of Beth coming to my apartment every night for “blowjob practice” the way she goes to the library to study every day. The thought was so thrilling that I wanted to force. More

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