Sobs tore at my chest, choking me, distorting my body with pain. Tears blinded me and I pounded the cushions on the sofa. I screamed out at the ceilin... and tore at my hair. Ten years of loneliness and self-denied torment boiled to the surface. I thought the intensity of it would kill me.I had no idea how long it went on—minutes, hours, days. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore. It was as if I had been transported back to that day when time had seemed to stop for me. So inconsolable was. "I look down between my legs and mommy is peeling small pieces of deadskin and tossing it in the toilet. I then see the rash that is all overmy penis as mommy starts to peel that dead skin and it all just peelsoff, and mommy drops it in the toilet. "Umm sweetie since you don't havea pen... um diaper to wear anymore you will have to wear a smallswimsuit and here it is." I see the bright yellow one-piece girl'sswimsuit mommy shows me that she took of the top of the sink. I notice itis the same. More

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