" Damn, there goes what little modesty I have left," Hanes chuckled, but the chuckle was weak."Do you have to go?" Bobby asked."No, not now, but the n...xt time I have to, I'd still like to try for the bathroom. I'll never get stronger if I don't get my butt to walking — well, hobbling. But that bedpan is a truly humbling experience, and this bedside commode, or whatever you call it ... Crap, hospitals take every bit of your dignity from you."He looked over at the IV stand that the nurses had. All I know is that I am now livingin a completely new world, one that I have absolutely no control over. I amnow living in a sexual nirvana controlled by lust and desire filled with paradoxes.I now feel total freedom while completely controlled by those who would useme for their own pleasures. Joy and fulfillment comes from pain while I feelthe power of complete submission to those who would use me. I am gaining strengthfrom my weakness while a heightened consciousness comes with my loss of. More

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