.. He’s a rock ‘ard, go ‘ard, take you in the back yard, mean muvva-fucker ... All the way from East ‘am ... I give you...”The curtain opens...and Casanova bounds onto the stage, skidding on the smooth surface. The small audience is now dumbstruck – lovers of naked women, they have all been regular viewers of our show and they realise what they are about to witness... “Casanova the Fird.”The audience applauds and lets out a few whoops and hollers – but other than that the only noise is the dog’s. Both of our priorities had changed, and our relationship was fizzling to an end. Neither of us wanted to admit it, but we could hardly think of reasons to be together anymore. I had even discovered that his proposal had been orchestrated. His campaign manger had reminded him that senators didn’t have girlfriends, they had wives and mistresses and if he didn’t want anyone getting the wrong idea he’d better get a ring on my finger. When he didn’t even call the rest of the night, my mind was made. More

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