I was the winner here. I won the big prize. Theo Weaselham (or whatever his name was) was just a sperm donor and a bad memory for her. I hoped.Then ca...e the day when I picked up my family at Dulles Airport. They were four (I thought) and therefore Lillian had stayed at home to do some last minute planning with her mother to leave enough room in my car. Imagine my surprise when an unknown elderly lady followed my parents and sisters from immigration into the arrivals hall. She had to be over. I glanced from one to the other. She was a vision of whoredom, wearing the kind of outfit that would see her stoned in some cultures. Her thin denim skirt was slung low on her prominent hip bones, and left very little to imagination; when she raised her arms and pirouetted into the room, it rose up, just a fraction, making it patently obvious that she was wearing no knickers. The arse that I had been the inspiration for many a lonely wank was suddenly parading around the room, fully exposed in. More

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