”“What I need to tell you involves what I confessed to you last night. Yes I am into self-flagellation. It is something of a disease in my mind. T...e self-punishment. I was wondering if you could help me to feel pain above what I can give to myself.”Wow! My angel wants me to give her pain. I don’t know if I can do that. What do I say to her? These words must be very carefully chosen. To say no will hurt her very much. To say yes, how far does she want me to go?How much is too much and how much. I hadn’t rejected that outright because anything was possible, and to be honest, I could see myself with her in the future if Fate brought us back together. I didn’t think it likely, but given what happened with Birgit, I wasn’t counting on anything or ignoring anything.I played chess with the chess team on Tuesday after school. I actually drew a couple of games, which made me feel good. Larry and I played chess on Wednesday. I liked spending time with him. Now that I wasn’t trying to compete,. More

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