" I crossed my heart but didn't hope to die. "What do you remember about Southend?"I thought for a moment. "Lots of things really. The pier of course.... Southend boasted that its pier was the longest in the world, or was it just the longest in Britain. I can never remember. "And that vast expanse of sticky grey mud when the tide went out. I always thought that calling it Southend on Sea was a little bit of adventurous advertising. It's really the Thames estuary. Everyone remembers the Kursall. She walked to and from work, taught standing up, ate standing up and even stood in staff meetings. The only time she sat down was when Vincent Crawford told her to and then it seemed to cause her the most exquisite discomfort. Everyone tried to guess the reason. Later on all became clear as, at Vincent?s orders, Helen?s skirts became shorter and shorter till the tassels showed below the hem of her skirt. It was clear that for months the poor teacher had been walking around with the greased whip. More

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