And I know it's going to be hard for you, j-just as it is for me. B-but you'll have to apply the flagellation instruments pretty hard, s-so that I-I ...an get the proper amount of swelling. W-what I'm saying dear, this is going to be painful for me. However, the Dr. said that any pity or mercy you show me ... by not applying the proper force with the instruments ... because you didn't want to cause me pain... would be a disservice to my health." I see darling. It'll be difficult, but I'll. It bonds them into a single close-knit coherent unit, a social group in its most primitive form.Had she been a weaker person, Amanda might have taken an overdose of pills or slashed her wrists. Yet she managed to stagger through the remaining couple of years until graduation. But she carried with her deep wounds and a heavy burden of unworthiness. Unworthy of love. Worthless. A waste. A total waste.Later, much later, she was still alone. Alone and lonely. Miserable. Unloved. Unlovable. In her. More

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