"I'm not your whoring bride, you pot-belied excuse for a limp pompadoodle. Besides, your salami is green with rot," the elf maid said. "You couldn't s...ick it up a pig's ass without tying it to a stick first." Better you than me," Pardin said to the dwarf, wondering what affection dwarfs had for pigs. Pardin wanted to make clear to the dwarf where the human stood in this lovers' quarrel."You might think it's her tongue, human, but don't be deceived. Washing her mouth out with soap is a useless. You wait, patiently, silently, expectantly for an instruction. When it comes, your heart skips a beat. “take your thong off” I say it loud enough that the waiter hears me, your breathing stops, time stands still, you look down at the table, your face is red, and your nipples are hard as rock. You’re worried about standing up and walking to the loo to take your thong off as everyone will watch you. You move to stand, still looking down, when you hear me say. “No, take it off here” you look up. More

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