Miserable because I still had the overwhelming fear of failure; miserable because an evening with someone I liked and secretly wanted had been such a ...isaster; and miserable because I had been such a poor dinner guest. Chloe seemed unaware of anything except that I was drunk and incapable. She helped me upstairs to bed, stripped me to my boxers and tucked me up in bed. She gave me a luscious goodnight kiss and left me. I dozed off in a combination of drunken stupor and tiredness.I woke up in. Over the next two weeks the baby would go through 2 surgeries, one on his head and one on his back. Even with all these surgeries the doctors were still skeptical of the abilities he would have. Would he be able to lead a normal life, like walk, talk, be his own dependant. They believed the baby would be basically brain dead and spend what ever life he had left in a bed. ‘That’s if he would survive that long’. The parents brought him home a few weeks later to care for as all parents do even. More

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