I told Ginny about my confrontation with Howard. She scolded me for being so careless. She knew of my desire to take a lover. She does not approve. Sh... warned me that Howard would never accept it. She can't understand why I would want to cheat on him. She sees him as the perfect husband. She's right of course. He is perfect. Too perfect.Why am I so hell-bent on self-destruction? Why do I think I can have my wonderful husband and another man on the side? I don't understand myself. It's not like. I figured that she would have told you.” “She just said that she was tired of some things and gave you an ultimatum and you walked out.” “Close enough, I guess. Anyhow, the court declared it final on Monday. And despite what she thinks or says, I still have not been with any other woman. I guess that is the irony of it all. I leave her because I am not having sex often enough with her and now it has been 9 months since I touched anyone.” We both just sat there a moment more and then Amanda. More

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