I’m Norbert Weiner and we’ve just moved. Would you know where we’ve moved to?” To which the young girl replied, “Yes daddy, mommy thought yo... would forget.”The Ideal Wife should be beautiful, but not so beautiful that people think you married her only for her beauty. And The Ideal Wife should be wealthy, but not so wealthy that people think you married her only for her money. And The Ideal Wife should be gentle, but not so gentle that she can’t suck a tennis ball through a fifty-foot garden. But you look again, don’t you? Just in case. So I looked again. Just in case. His foot was facing the wrong way. You can’t fake that, so I was off to Paco again. But this time he came to check before phoning. On the way I had a sudden feeling of dread. I remembered a boy at school who was able to make both feet face behind him. This joker could obviously do that too, because he’d gone again. Embarrassed, I pointed up, but Paco was already walking away mumbling something about ‘ooligan Inglese’. More

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