12. I am a nobody and nobody is perfect, therefore, I am perfect.13. Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've staye... alive.14. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America???15. Having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.16. Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked.17. Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.18. Every time I walk into a singles bar I. Look-alike spirit.]It stopped right in front of him and projected a bunch of smiley faces which surrounded him. [Oh gosh. Is the person controlling this thing some anime girl who’s happy all the fucking time?} The spirit, annoyed at the comment, instantly turned those glowing smiley faces into angry frowns. Benjamin, unsure how to communicate with a spirit, sent a smiley face back in return. The new spirit instantly turned the smiley faces into even brighter smiles than before, and instantly. More

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