I wished I could shock everybody that I knew with what I now knew and could do. “Fuck” was my standard to bear.The images of what I really was now...kept racing through my head, tied to memories of my parents while I was growing up. This was confusion beyond frightening.I turned and went into the bunk house expecting to find Lilly or my work mates on the beds but found the place empty. I wasn’t sure who I might find since the daily trade off between Lilly and her sisters was still a mystery to. On 9/11 I could tell she was not doing well so we left for home. Went in for her 1 year checkup. It was back. This time down her left side from her shoulder to her ass. They did three months of kemo and radiation. Then up to Atlanta for another operation. I took her home. She calls her sister to ask if she could over with her while went to a job about 90 miles from. I was working 5 days a week for 12 hours a day. Coming home on Friday night to see her for a night and a day and a half. Now we. More

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