’ There was an awkward silence because I didn’t know what to say. I was actually feeling guilty for how I acted tonight at the party and sorry tha... I didn’t listen to her in the first place and skip the damn function all together. As usual it was my ego. I had wanted everyone to see me receive that award. Now in addition to Felicia’s headache, she was drinking. Then I had to go and act like a jackass and compound her problems. In the grand scheme of things besides my cheating, I was a hindrance. Where man goes, we follow. Who can doubt that we are family?’ ‘Man is indisputably a corvid,’ cawed the crow, strutting about. ‘He ambulates upon two legs, as we do. He flits about hither and thither, never staying in one place for long, as we do. He is far too hairless to be a mammal. It is far more probable that the hair he does possess is simply an outlier. Just as we hold parliaments and funerals, so, too, does he. ‘From my own observations, it is evident that he is a fellow bird who has. More

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