At the time I was 31 years old, and visiting a friend in NYC. One day I started chatting up a match on tinder. She was 45 years old and visiting NYC f...r work. She told me that she was staying at a really nice hotel on the lower east side and was looking for her first random hookup after a messy divorce. Whether that was true or not I still don’t know but to be honest I didn’t really care. Around 9 pm she wrote me asking if I’d like to come to her hotel room and smoke a joint with her. I agreed,. When my period started though, I knew it was all over, and that was when I first started trying to will myself to die. I stopped eating or drinking anything. I might have succeeded too, except for Tina, who drove me to the hospital when she came home one day and found me passed out on the floor. She couldn't revive me when she tried. The doctor at the hospital called what I was doing an hysterical reaction, and told me he'd have me committed to a psychiatric hospital, unless I promised him that. More

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