My heart and soul and all I cared for in this world lay at the bottom of that hole. Nothing and nobody mattered anymore. I turned and walked away int... my own sort of darkness. I got into my car and drove away. I thought about going to a bar. Drowning my sorrow in the bottle but that meant dealing with people, people who new what had happened and would want to offer their sympathy. That I couldn't take. I just wanted to get stupid drunk and forget, at least for a little while. The house was. " Maybe, but still, it is a bit disconcerting." I added. "I just don't know. Ineed to sleep on all of this talk." Ok, goodnight, sweetie." and she kissed me on the cheek like a sister. Hadshe done that two nights ago, I would have tried to kiss her back. Instead, Ijust said goodnight and lay there lost in my thoughts as I drifted off tosleep.Today, was a big awakening for me. Last night's conversation with Gina helpedme clear a lot of things up. Today, I was going to take a deeper step. More

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