To write of itself as other than an it, is stressful, reminding it of the way it used to think when it was a person, and the nightmarish pain that it ...ow associates with the struggle it put up in fighting its surrender. You see, it's not that it lives without pain--on the contrary, it lives with pain every moment of its life. Just that it understands now that pain, abuse, degradation, humiliation, torture, punishment, service, and solitude are the states of existence that it was meant to. Left to my own devices, Richard had a lot of other business interests and I showed I knew how to handle the animals in terms of care etc. I roamed amongst them all to different degrees; Richard leaving me a sort of list and suggesting one gelding actually prepared to drop for me after a certain bit of innocent stroking if for instance anyone was around, but unfortunately we were in plain view of the road.Moving on to the mares, again with a list, I found them all quite friendly, and only a. More

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