To say the least, I tended to dread the moment when sex was a real possibility, and that, in turn, created a negative feed-back loop that you could ri...htly call 'performance anxiety!'So, it was with tremendous relief (for me) when I met Mara and started dating her, because she said she fully understood my anxiety about sex (and my personal preference for masturbation). Furthermore, she said she liked me a lot, and that we didn't really need to have sex to date; and that's how it applied. It ended eventually, or so I thought. After April there were other girls. Sometimes yes, sometimes no, sure, but more often than not girls who were just as interested as I was. I learned, slowly, that making her happy would make me happy. I learned that generosity is often returned. But when I saw April, and we did see each other now and then, it always turned out the same way. She wouldn't let me go but she didn't seem to want to go anywhere with me, either.In college, finally, April walked. More

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