"What I'm trying to say," Mum says more firmly, "is that just becauseyou'll be, well, legal, and just because Ollie's older than you, itdoesn't mean t...at you should, you know, 'take advantage' or your age atthe first opportunity you get." I won't, I promise," I say truthfully, though inwardly I scream at thewoman's sheer hypocrisy. When she was setting me up with her friends'sons, all of whom were footballers or actors, Mum would constantlyencourage me to 'do whatever it takes to make them like. I eagerly said yes seeing myself as the pimp. It wasn’t until a few days later that I got a better idea of what she had in mind when I came home and saw my outfit all laid out. “Honey, what’s this?” I asked. She came out of the closet all decked out like a 70s pimp, complete with furry hat and pimping jacket. “Oh that’s your outfit.” She said. “I thought it would look great on you. See, a short leather miniskirt, a pair of fishnets, crotchless underwear, of course, and you have no idea how long. More

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