He shook his head and looked away. ‘You amaze me.’ He said. I looked up. ‘Why?’ ‘In the midst of your husband’s pending death, your sister...in-law’s death and the possibility that we could both freeze to death and nobody would find us for years you still find it necessary to lecture me on morals and family. As if those things matter right now.’ ‘They do. Would you rather die a murdering bastard or with a clear record?’ I snapped tired of talking to him and wishing I hadn’t woke him up. ‘I’d. I broke out the baby powder and tooted up a few lines. As the high settled into my brain my thoughts went to what Patty had told me she had seen in my eyes. She was right I was getting to where I no longer knew whom or what I was becoming and it was getting to me.I could no longer trust Sherri or myself for I resented the fact that John saw me as Carrie and not as myself. I was to blame for I was the one who went along with it and now wished I never had. I tooted up some more coke trying to. More

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