Another minor detail about my virginity: I had a secret. It was a secret I had never revealed to anyone for fear of shame, humiliation, or disgust. Th...s was back before the internet if I did have the web back then I quickly would have found that I was not alone. But as it was, I to this day think I have some inkling what it might be like to grow up gay and in the closet, so great was my sexual desire, trumped only by my need to keep my preference secret. What was my deep dark secret? I liked. "What?" Havin' a baby out o' wedlock," Alys looks at me like I am going to judge her."Alys, you were forced to have sex with 'verse only knows how many men. It is a damn wonder that you are only now getting pregnant." I rant a little until I notice she has that fearful look back in her eyes. "Of chaos and patterns, this is not your fault." I didn't fight," she says looking down at her feet."Where did this come from?" I halt my pace and force her to look me in the eye."I don't wanna be a. More

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