.. Two figures – one short and fat, the other sleek and elegant. It’s crazy cockney Dennis, and his handsome hound, Casanova the Doberman.Once aga...n, our host is straining the material of his beloved West Ham shirt, his belly and man-boobs stretching the fabric as he smiles his way through another introduction. “Ello, welcome to another edition of the ‘United Kingdom of Zoo’ ... I’m Dennis ... This is Casanova ... And back in there...” He indicates behind him, possibly to the zoo, possibly just. I set a table for two and lit candles then lit a fire in the gas fireplace. I loaded five DVD’s in the player and sat down for a while. It wasn’t long before Steve called to say he had picked up dinner and was on the way. Lucky China Restaurant is about a ten minute drive so I’d have just enough time. I went upstairs and put the dress and veil on, then the shoes. I touched up my make-up and went back down. I made us both a drink and sat down in the living room. I sipped my drink and waited. More

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