I thought to myself, "Sweet. Fucking sweet. Maybe I can get a couple of friends to come over and we can watch some movies and shit." So I make a few c...lls, no luck. It's Friday night, and everyone but me has a girlfriend to party with. So I decide I'll ask Marian if she wants to come with me to rent some movies. As I knock on the door gently, I listen for signs of activity. There is none. So I crack the door a little to see if she's asleep, and there she is. Stretched out on the bed with. I wore this dress because I wanted to. Because as difficult as it’s going to be, I wanted to be beautiful and sexy in Alan’s eyes, not just in his memory. I want him to share in my frustrated libido.We thanked Carolyn, our chauffeur, for the ride, and arm-in-arm, Robert supporting me, we walked into the unknown.Alan was there, in his entrance lobby, waiting for us – for me. We stood, just looking at each other, me trying my hardest not to cry. I loved this man, wanted to spend my life with him.. More

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