And I really thought I was able to separate sex from feelings. I thought if I could have sex like a man purely to just have sex without guilt, feeling... or emotions, it would be fun. But I’m finding the more time I spend with you the more I cannot be that man. You are not like my other affairs. We spend a great deal of time together. Plus you want to do things with me, which confuses me. I’m getting mixed signals. So why don’t I just quit you? You have become my drug. The high you give me, is. I don't know why but I just wanted to trip out andlisten to music and play video games. I lived like that for severalyears and if you want to know the truth I was the worst negativestereotype of a community college student, I was only taking one classeach semester and I would usually get a C.The years drifted by and nobody stepped in and encouraged me to get onwith my life, Dad avoided that discussion, I think he thought I hadn'tgotten over Mom's death and he didn't want to force me to move on. More

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