I became more impressionable, sometimes I wascrying without any reason. I was expecting some changes of my body butprobably I needed more time for thi... to become noticeable.I must become a little inadvertent and my mother noticed a training braunder my shirt. I'd preferred neither to remember nor to rehearse whatshe'd said for me and what names she was calling me. My life was ruined.Mother was fighting for my masculinity if it was hidden by me from theworld. She was trying to control me in full. My face was burning."About Friday night," we both began, then stopped. "You first," weboth said, then burst out in laughter."Let's get moving," I said, taking her hand. "I have ballet toattend." After a short pause, I asked, unsure of my words, "Did we gotoo far Friday?" Well..." she said."I felt really guilty yesterday at Church. It felt like -- I feelsilly and embarrassed talking about church to people outside it. Thewords we use mean different things. I'll just say it -- it felt. More

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