And that’s cool and all, ’cause I’m not down with Satan or nothing, and Jesus is like the Lord of Hosts and all that, but let me tell you, I kno... from personal experience that once you get past all that perfect-being bullshit, Jesus can be a real jerk. It all started when I put that ad in the newspaper for a new roommate. Brad was moving in with his girlfriend and kinda left me hanging. I thought it woulda been cool to get one of my buddies to move into the place, but they’re all fucking. ” Jack succinctly summed up what the international news had reported just moments before he woke from his enforced slumber.“How good did your guys cover their tracks?” I had to ask.“Let’s see ... My team was completely tied up shooting wild animals in Africa. Our guys were so successful that local newspapers ran photos of them with tribal leaders, as they turned over the carcasses to be used for food and hides. The locals were so grateful that they held a feast just for our team, and provided. More

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