"Perhaps some few may conceive of a heaven populated by wholly disembodied spirits, but in most representations I have seen the angels are quite solid...y physical. Did not one of the Old Testament prophets even wrestle with one of them? And many of the supposed joys of the afterlife are sensual in nature—tastes, smells, sounds, sights, textures. Indeed, I believe one of the great post-mortem rewards of Islamic male heroes is to be presented with seventy female virgins to be deflowered at. In the hallway, Sam grabbed her arm and said, ‘Oh my god, M.J., you looked like you were in space in there.’ ‘Yeah, I know. I was lucky that Taylor didn’t call on me.’ ‘Look, you either need to do something about this Eduardo thing, or you need to get your shit together.’ ‘What should I do?’ she asked. ‘Maybe start by actually talking to him,’ Sam suggested. ‘I guess so,’ M.J. said, unenthusiastically. She turned into her third period art class, and Sam went off to econ. Luckily, Eduardo wasn’t. More

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