So far, I have 10 fridges.A jellyfish walks into a hardware store and buys ten drills.Supermarket: a place where you can spend a half-hour looking for...instant coffee.How can you spot people who can’t count to twenty? They’re in front of you in the supermarket express lane.I bought some Haagen-Dazs ice cream, and as the cashier rang it up, I asked: “How do you pronounce that.” She said slowly: “Five dollars and 29 cents.”✧ ✧ ✧left my last girlfriend because she wouldn’t stop counting. I wonder. Then her tone softens and she takes my hand, just like last night at the beach, and she looks warmly into my eyes. “I had a great time too, Dane. Thanks for inviting me. But you and I won’t work anymore, I am afraid.”I shuffle my feet and then look up at her, sadly, “One screw-up and that’s it? You don’t think you are overreacting?”With her kind eyes still focusing warmly on me, she whispers,”This is an escape, an affair, naughty sex, Dane. I don’t want a relationship. I already have one. So do. More

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