I still hungered for her, as a lover and especially as a friend. I knew the lover part wasn't in the cards at all, but I really missed her friendship,...and kept hoping we might revive that. Over the years we'd shared so many good times and she'd always been there for me.But she was skittish, unsure. I suspected she was afraid if she got too close to me I might press the lover issue, which I'd never, ever do. I was hoping over time that fear might go away and we could just be friends. ..I was five years away from my legal age, Paul my best friend also the same age as me & Stephen, Pauls Brother 19 or 20 years oldI had just had my birthday I was really quite nieve, having not really discussed anything sexualand back in those days everyone was nieve, there was no internet or porn at your fingertips,the only thing we ever got to see was the odd leaf from a dirty magazine that may have been strewneither in the bushes or at the back of the garages further up on the estate, it. More

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