I am almost hoping that you have moved on. It would spare me some difficult decisions ahead, but I also fear this possibility. I am at once terrified ...f being with you and of losing you. Crazy? I already stated that I'm a loon, right?I am also afraid that by allowing you near me, I will set you up for more hurt in the future. I don't want to hurt you! Mom keeps telling me that I'll hurt you the most by not allowing you near me. I want to believe that, but then the memories come back, and I. Though I have a great desire to makefriends with a transsexual lady and even serve as a maid, she knows thatmen are on the hard limit list. But so are scat, animals and children.But I digress... Those that get this close to me will learn all of thisat their own pace. Besides, that is half the fun; isn't it?This weekend Tanya grabbed me. "Time you did something! Try once more!You are going to write your story and post it on the web!" Tanya, I don't know..." trista, listen. I have found a. More

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