Jude started drinking around 6, first wine, then frozen margaritas once the machine was ready. She was loose and happy by the time the first guests be...an to arrive, just before 8. The Clarks, as usual, were early. Some of her yoga ladies and their plus-ones came after that. I herded everyone inside and got everyone drinks.By 8:30, Marcel was a no-show, but so was Jude’s best friend Melissa and her husband Dave. I badly wanted to talk with Dave tonight, so I was keeping an eye out for their. That’s me at the moment. My head hurts and I had to leave work early because I went totally mute. But I’m not shaking and I don’t need my cane and my wife’s not crying or yelling at me. I feel relatively happy. I had a nap and a bowl of chili with some shredded cheese in it.Last night I was a little down and feeling envious which is an emotion I try to avoid like the plague. It’s almost as poisonous as bitterness which will kill your soul. I was envious because there’s all these people who can. More

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